NOLA

I went to New Orleans this past weekend. For all intents and purposes, it was pretty interesting. I was told that if I had gone around the time that Mardi Gras was going on, then I would have had more fun than I already had there. What was interesting to me was the free-spiritied people that lived there. The houses were big, personalities from people around you were welcoming and although there was so much to do, I only had 5 days to enjoy myself. The sun was shining, and almost everyone was smiling.

I live in New York. And to me, NY is so depressing. New York City not so much. But I live in Central New York. And statistics show that it is one of the most depressing and sunless cities in the United States. What caught my attention one time when I was reading an article about Central New York was that it rained 39% of the time. That is almost as much as Seattle Washington. And we all know how much it rains in Seattle.

I began to think, while I was on the plane; how much does where you live have to do with your mood? Your ambitions? Your thoughts about where you live, what are they? Do you feel lost? I can just imagine if I lived in California or somewhere that was sunny all the time, I would be a little bit chipper more often. Heck, I might even give money away to strangers. Or dance like Fiddler on the Roof. Pictures showing the fun that I had will be coming soon. Must edit some though. Isn't it amazing how much you can do to edit your photos? Toodles until then. 

Go for the green

I began to think about freedom today. What makes you "free"? What do you have to do to be free? Why is it that when we think about freedom and everything that it entails, we sometimes think about the limitations? What's holding us back? What is giving us the problem with succeeding and moving forward?

Flower...

 

I had went to get a tattoo a few months back. It was so much fun...painful (even with this being the 7th one) but it was done by such a great artist: Cate at Resurrected Tattoo. Do you have any tattoos? How many? What are the significances of them?

Only fur your eyes to see

It was not too long ago that I challenged myself to go to one of my favorite Vintage shops here in Syracuse and come out with 1 item. I love this shop so much because of the wonderful things you can find there without the immense effort of searching. This lovely jacket was one of them...

Jacket: Vintage// Shirt: Forever 21// Leggings: Mossimo by Target// Boots: Target

A side of Royal Blue please...

I walked into the Deb shop with a friend of mine and she could not believe the look on my face. I said "I am not completely convinced that I will find anything in here."
"Why?" she asked
"Because I do not usually shop here. I mean look at some of these clothes..."
"Just have faith that you will find something Elle" she says

10 minutes later I am at the checkout with this blazer in my hands, along with a gorgeous red one just like it.
 "$10.80" says the cashier
"Oh wow..." I reply
To my amazement it was $5 for each of these blazers!! I did not look at the price of them. I just saw them and knew I had to have both of them.
"So you did find something huh?" my friend says
"Shut up" I said, smiling and laughing

Have you ever found yourself judging something or someone based on what you see or have heard? Only to find that your judgment is wrong? Give chances... And so I did. And this blazer is one of my favorite staples this winter season.

Blazer: Deb Shops// Dress: Vintage// Tights: Forever 21// Sash: Vintage

You're not really that hungry, are you?

Jacket: Old Navy Activewear // Tights: H&M // Sneakers: Nike

If you're anything like I was a few months ago, you might have been in a rut. I had no idea where I was going when it came to fitness, and health. I know I loved to cook & learn new recipes; but portion control was a restraint I was lacking. Apparently so was the ability to ignore early morning cravings. I couldn't pry my hands off of the refrigerator door at 3am. During the day was fine, but it was late night that was posing the problem. When the topic of weight loss comes up, not eating after 7 is a common statement made by those hoping to lose some pounds. As unfortunate as it is, at 3 am; I am not necessarily coherent. And I feel like I am not able to process a common sense judgment such as leaving the refrigerator alone. In a search for a solution, I stumbled upon a post written by a guy who went through the same thing. And his solution? Write 'are you really hungry or just bored or thirsty?' on a piece of paper and tape it on the inside of the refrigerator. I did it and night one went well. The following nights did as well. I found myself waking up and grabbing water or an orange or some other piece of fruit. Which was better than the calorie-filled food I was searching for. 

Conforming To Thoughts..

I spent a good majority of my life conforming to what others thought of me. It was never sincerely what I really wanted to do.I remember having conversations with my mom about what I wanted to do for college, and what I wanted to be. It was apparent to me that I had no truly clear idea. But I knew that art would somehow be included in my life. And even if we get separated, and we come back to each other; art and I had a real love. And it was a true, rockhard love.

Walking down that road we call uncertainty, I just want to know more and more about myself.  And so I  often ask myself what can you possibly conquer out in the world if you can’t conquer yourself? You won’t be able to  look at yourself through their eyes. You will have to look at yourself through your own eyes. You  have to look at every single part of yourself and discover the reasons for why you are the way that you are. A self discovery like this might come at a hard time in your life because of other things that you may have going on. But it should only allow you to sustain more discipline when it comes to you needing yourself to depend on. Many lessons have been learned as a result of my journey to self discovery. The main lesson that I have learned is that it is very important for me to keep a belief in myself. A belief in myself that is stronger than any belief that someone else could have in me. But this has been the hardest thing for me to learn. Some of the questions I had at the beginning were: How can I love myself completely if I blame myself for some or most things that go wrong in my life? And where do I start? 

I began to stop looking at myself in such a negative manner.  Before, I used to feel fine with insulting myself on the regular, and pointing out flaws about myself that were really nothing to be ashamed of in the first place. But I thought that because I was comparing myself to other people, that they were flaws that were real. And that they were flaws that I needed to correct to feel better about myself. But little did I know that I needed to solve the root of the problem. And the problem was that I was comparing myself to other people and allowing how they look/feel/act to dictate my life and what I think about me. Whenever you think you aren’t worthy of something, or there are things you don’t like about yourself or doubt yourself or anything that you do, think about what this is doing to yourself. Think about it as a garden that you are constantly subjecting to harsh weather conditions. If it is constantly snowing and raining and hailing on this garden, whatever is being grown in the garden is going to be ruined. Thus is the same for us. If we’re constantly subject ourselves to “harsh conditions”, then we will not be able to blossom and grow into beautiful beings. We need water, nutrition, and light. Though I could sit here and name many different metaphors that you can use for this scenario; it’s better that you use what you have been through and what your situation is at this moment to create the meaning.